Raindogblue

Waiting, Lurking, Watching

The great, blue heron
hunches over
the clear creek culvert
like a feathered troll
waiting for a meal.

Denied

 

Today, at court, 

the Defendant said,

“Your Honor, I would like 

this citation dismissed

due to a technical error.”

 

The Judge replied, 

“What is the technical error?”

 

“Well the Officer wrote 1648

for the time of the violation.

Time is measured in numbers

of one to twelve,

Since the hour sixteen

does not exist,

I’d like the ticket dismissed.

 

The Judge took a breath and said,

“Sir, the Officer is using military time

1648 is 4:48 PM.”

 

“Military Time? Oh....

I’ve never heard of that.

I’m sorry.”

 

“Your motion to dismiss is denied.”

 

 

 

Fall Series: Delta

 

 

 

 

Robert

 

A Drunk calls dispatch,

demanding an ambulance,

says he’s been assaulted

by a seventy year old.

I know the guy.

 

Robert, What’s up.

“I’ve been assaulted!”

Where’s the injury?

On my lip.

He peels it back to show me.

“See!”

There’s nothing.

No mark. No blood. No Swelling. No bruising.

“Oh..”

You were assaulted by a seventy year old man?

“No!”

So why’d you call?

“Uhh. I want you to check on him”

How much you been drinking?

“Nuthin!”

Really?

“Well, a little....”

 

The old man’s fine. 

He’s no idea why we’re here.

Robert’s his friend.

He’s drunk, too.

 

Bobby. Go to bed.

“That’s a good idea officer. 

I’m sorry.”

 

He’s not.

He’ll call again

and again.

 

Fall Series: Charlie

 

 

 

Off

 

I've truncated my work week.

Thursday, I took off today,

for a four day weekend. 

My bid for Thanksgiving

was granted by seniority.

I'll have a two day work week

with no  court.

I'll enjoy the time

away and the sleep.

Rain on the Prowler

 

 

Download Rain on the Prowler

 

And then, the down pour.

 

Download Twenty Seconds of Storm

At Jail

 

 

During booking, the jail

deputy asked my custody,

"Do have any body piercings?

Any bling in your ding-ding?"

 Without blinking

the man said, "No."

 

 

Forms of Humor

 

In the office, Double D

turned to a new officer and said,

"I see you have grabbed a stack

of wealth redistribution forms."

 

The new officer said, "What?"

 

Double D, "Citations?"

 

"Oh... Yeah."

 

 

 

OK