Lately, I have found that I cannot tell if I am getting
less done, or if I am just attempting to do more.
Regardless, I am not getting all that I would like done.
Despite not doing holiday markets, despite no longer
having small children, and despite my best intentions
to focus, I still find myself behind. Do I get tired
more easily, or am I working harder? It's so hard to tell.
I keep thinking I'll catch up, but perhaps I continue
to fill my plate to that just-tipping point from a need
to feel full and busy. I don't know. I think I see an
opening in my calendar as an opening to schedule more.
It's hard to embrace the idea that empty space in ones
schedule, is like a quiet place in a painting. You need
a bit of empty space to rest ones eye. I think that I am
making smarter choices with my overload. The things
I am doing are either necessary or bring me joy, and
most of the things that clutter my To Do list do both.
And when it gets to be too much, I let something go.
That would explain my erratic blogging this year.
I continue to try and capture what I do here, but
sometimes the Doing outweighs the Recording.
I still manage to cycle back around, but sometimes
I need a bit of a nudge.